Gornji Vakuf wasn't supposed to survive. I was just there waiting for a train or so I told some of my closest friends. There wasn't a working train depot there, but I was speaking metaphorically. A short time before I left I saw a train being driven across town on a UN truck. I could not believe my eyes but it seems my train had arrived actually.
There are many funny stories I remember but it is hardest to translate the humor. A friend wanted me to translate to a German that he had got to ride his bike everyday 36 kilometers. He was laughing which she could not understand. It was war time so there are only sad stories there she was sure. He laughed even louder when I explained how sad she thought his story was. He said, "everybody else was walking." The last thing I learned to understand in Bosnia was the humor.
It did not take long to understand the city I was living in was not supposed to be. In war those in charge make grand plans. This Vakuf was assumed a loss. They didn't know the people living there. In such a terrible war their city had more per capita damage than any. They rolled barrel bombs down hills they had all had picnics together on as children.
What is a Vakuf? An endowment made by a Muslim to a religious, educational, or charitable cause. In Islamic law, a waqf is an inalienable endowment – typically a building, plot of land or another property that has been dedicated for Muslim religious or charitable purposes. The word for who is in charge there: the Imam has another meaning in the Bosnian language. It means I have. So you could imagine a needy person coming to the Vakuf to meet with the I have.
"How are you Imam?"
To which the answer in Bosnian would be, "I have."
The word "inalienable" means something that is not transferable. So you might wonder how it is that they always have. When I first learned the word Turbe in Bosnia I was told that it was like a toll booth. People were obligated to leave money as they passed. The word is derived from the Arabic تُرْبَة turbah (meaning "soil/ground/earth"), What it really is is a monument to the dead where people leave money for the upkeep of the memorial and the general community.
Travnik, in modern Bosnia and Herzegovina, became the capital of the Ottoman province of Bosnia and residence of the Bosnian viziers after 1699, when Sarajevo was set ablaze by Prince Eugene of Savoy. The Grand Viziers were sometimes buried in Travnik, and türbe shrines were erected in their honor in the heart of the Old town of Travnik, where they stand today.
So an inalienable endowment founded and funded by the great leaders of the past. The people most responsible for bringing us here today. When war broke out nothing seemed inalienable, but this upper and lower Vakuf would both survive in central Bosnia. And today as long as they can remember they have.
each worse than worse
Somethings you hear are hard to tell
Can take everything of you to comprehend
It is just words you can share
After years of war and no electricity there is nothing to hide
No way to conceal anything
They saw each other survive
Persecution will bring you wisdom
All the layers exposed to the bone
Marrow the heart of the meal
In the worst times and the worst places they know the most
"Each worse than worse" carries a universal resonance as "all have sinned and fall short," suggesting that everyone, in some way, experiences suffering or failure, and each person's experience is uniquely profound. The shared nature of human imperfection, "each worse than worse" reflects the idea that in the face of persecution or hardship, everyone is touched by some degree of suffering that strips away illusions.
People say they know things they do not.
Life comes in two phases in my experience. Development and Emergency. You could be taking on beliefs, expectations, or paths that are not entirely your own—perhaps driven by the urgency or pressures of the "Emergency" phase in life. In John 6, many of the disciples were following Jesus, perhaps without fully understanding or truly internalizing His teachings. When confronted with a challenging truth, they faltered and turned away. The disciples had to decide whether to continue following Jesus after hearing His challenging words.
John 6 is about choosing the harder, slower path of genuine belief and commitment, rather than the easy, fast-moving path that may lead to disillusionment or abandonment when things become difficult. Moving away from the urgency of living by external pressures and towards a more thoughtful and patient approach, seeking deeper truths even when they are hard to accept. There also must be a recognition of what a blessing a choice is. In those worse times and worse places things are simplified in many ways that are counterintuitive. There is only life and no life there. You either survive or you do not.
There is an expression for this reality in the Balkans: everybody has their own. It is one of the most logical and tragic of ideas. There are endless challenges that we face in our lives today, whether they are external pressures, internal doubts, or the complexities of navigating faith in a modern world. The Spiritual journey is marked by moments of struggle, where we need to find strength beyond ourselves.
Paul’s call to "put on the full armor of God" is a powerful metaphor for how Christians are to stand firm in their faith amidst spiritual warfare—belt of truth, breastplate of righteousness, shield of faith, helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit— equip believers to face both visible and invisible challenges. Prayer is a constant source of strength and connection to God, remember Paul's exhortation to pray in the Spirit on all occasions. As we said recently, "Pray for what you cannot imagine."
Let us look closer at John 6:56-69 from the Amplified Bible to deepen our understanding of inalienable.
56 He who eats My flesh and drinks My blood [believes in Me, accepts Me as Savior] remains in Me, and I [in the same way remain] in him. 57 Just as the living Father sent Me, and I live because of the Father, even so the one who feeds on Me [believes in Me, accepts Me as Savior] will also live because of Me. 58 This is the Bread which came down out of heaven. It is not like [the manna that] our fathers ate and they [eventually] died; the one who eats this Bread [believes in Me, accepts Me as Savior] will live forever.”
An inalienable endowment, a base line for community; we have.
59 He said these things in a synagogue while He was teaching in Capernaum.
60 When many of His disciples heard this, they said, “This is a difficult and harsh and offensive statement. Who can [be expected to] listen to it?” 61 But Jesus, aware that His disciples were complaining about it, asked them, “Does this cause you to stumble and take offense?
Nothing feels inalienable in this world. Impossible to take away or give up. It often feels we live in a world of shadows, but we must remember they are only possible because of the light.
62 What then [will you think] if you see the Son of Man ascending to [the realm] where He was before? 63 It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh conveys no benefit [it is of no account]. The words I have spoken to you are spirit and life [providing eternal life]. 64 But [still] there are some of you who do not believe and have faith.” For Jesus knew from the beginning who did not believe, and who would betray Him. 65 And He was saying, “This is the reason why I have told you that no one can come to Me unless it has been granted him [that is, unless he is enabled to do so] by the Father.”
Jesus feels inalienable. This is what is hardest for us to comprehend with all of the layers and depth we accumulate in this world. We can easily forget who we are.
66 As a result of this many of His disciples abandoned Him, and no longer walked with Him.
People worry if the church will attract enough people. Will the Turbe go empty and so too the compassion of the community. Jesus never worried about how many followers he had. At times he actually seemed to be concerned when too many people followed him at the wrong time.
It is by design that we are resilient. The image of our own creator. Jesus seems solely focused on saving everyone. This is the great example of his life. Inalienable our inheritance.
67 So Jesus said to the twelve [disciples], “You do not want to leave too, do you?” 68 Simon Peter answered, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You [alone] have the words of eternal life [you are our only hope]. 69 We have believed and confidently trusted, and [even more] we have come to know [by personal observation and experience] that You are the Holy One of God [the Christ, the Son of the living God].”
Was similar when I arrived in Vakuf. Everyone who could go somewhere had went. They spoke with the Imam, "to whom shall we go?" They become more religious during the war in Bosnia. This was a former communist country after all. People were out of practice. But they knew what a Vakuf was, they still had a Turbe and the I have.
My good friend was the one who told me he thought each person was worse than the next. It helped me to understand what he was saying because I could see him. I think it would be easier to explain if you could see him. He wasn't judging anyone. He was simply telling me what he had seen. So many years in such darkness nothing was hidden. We often say that we fall short of the glory of God, but we don't always see or feel it. Life is rarely stripped to its essential.
This is what the conspiracy theory person is looking for: simplicity.
Jesus, when He presents Himself as the Bread of Life, is calling His followers to a deep, abiding relationship with Him. Many of Jesus' disciples struggled with the idea of fully committing to Him, leading some to turn away. Peter’s response: "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life." This highlights the necessity of remaining steadfast in faith, even when the path is challenging or unclear. One thing we know: it is not simple.
The call to "put on the armor of God" and the call to abide in Christ as the Bread of Life emphasize the need for spiritual fortification—whether it’s through the protective armor or through the sustaining nourishment that Christ provides. The struggle in John 6 mirrors the spiritual battles described in Ephesians 6. The decision to follow Christ, especially when His teachings are difficult, is itself a form of spiritual warfare.
And indeed, to whom shall we go? Huh!
The phrase "each worse than worse" reflects on the trials that believers face, acknowledging that just as all have sinned and fall short, all also encounter their own battles. Yet, through these struggles, you are equipped and sustained by God. If we could really see and the world was a much worse place: we would understand better. Pray for peace, but be ready to understand.
Recognize the spiritual armor that God provides is not just a metaphor, but a real and necessary aspect of your faith life. Lean on Christ as your sustenance, especially in moments of doubt or difficulty, just as Peter did when faced with the choice to leave or stay. The wisdom that comes from enduring persecution or hardship, through suffering and perseverance, allows believers to grow deeper in faith and understanding.
The Christian walk involves battles, both internal and external, God equips His people to stand firm. In the worst times and the worst places, God’s strength is made perfect in our weakness, and through Him, we find the wisdom and resilience to continue on the path of faith.
John 6:56-69 can be interpreted as a radical call to absolute, transformative commitment. Jesus challenges His followers to fully partake in His life—symbolized by eating His flesh and drinking His blood—as a means of becoming one with Him. This demand for total identification with Him, even at the cost of social norms or personal comfort, leads many to abandon Him.
In this radical view, the passage is not just about belief but about a profound, consuming union with Christ that overturns conventional life, forcing a choice between superficial following and deep, often unsettling, spiritual transformation. It’s a test of who is willing to embrace the unsettling, revolutionary nature of true faith, even when it means standing apart from the crowd.
each worse than worse - an inalienable endowment - includes us all. There is nothing separating us from Gaza, Ukraine, Yemen, Sudan, Myanmar, Haiti, Afghanistan, Burkina Faso, Colombia or Mexico. Even in the worst places that have no working depot - trains still arrive and depart.
For many more generations in Bosnia a Vakuf will be a place not a memory. There are many ways to describe it, but my closest friends in Bosnia really taught me that all you really need is a Turbe and a Vakuf. Doesn’t matter your historical perspective call them what you will. You can't change the Balkans. It's plastic that changes. What humans make changes. What God makes lives.
Let Us Pray
Lord of all,
In times of struggle, remind us of the strength found in community, like the Vakuf—an enduring fountain of faith. Help us to stand firm, trusting in Your provision and care. When we face hardship, may we be a source of light and hope for others, drawing from the inalienable gifts You've given us.
Guide us to remain steadfast in our commitment to You, even when the path is difficult. Fill us with Your peace and the courage to live out our faith each day.
In Your name, we pray.
Amen.
Benediction
Go forth with courage, grounded in the enduring foundation of faith, like a Vakuf that stands through all trials. May your heart be open, your spirit strong, and your faith unwavering as you walk in the light of grace. Draw strength from the inalienable gifts that God has bestowed upon you, and may you be a beacon of hope and resilience to others.
Amen.
Nottingham UMC 8/25/2024